Fishing and what not

ugh 1

Long lonely highway

Last weekend I drove out before the crack of dawn to try my luck on some ice-off Northern Pike. About halfway into the three-hour drive I found myself questioning my sanity.

Long story short: I missed the window for ice-off pike to take dead bait by 2 weeks. This I learned from the nice Game Warden who almost fined me $500 for not having a state park permit. Luckily he took pity on my lame ass and let me follow him into to town where I could buy a permit. Oh, and yes, he told me that the pike will hit dead bait for approximately 1 week after the ice is off. They’ll hit dead bait again for about a week after their April spawn. He said it’s no problem for the guys who live nearby and can monitor the lake. A little more challenging if you have to drive 3 hours!

This is what not catching fish looks like

This is what not catching fish looks like

Back to fishing in a second…

P90X3: I’ve taken to doubling 1-2 of the 30-minute workouts each week. This turns a typical 30-minute workout into an hour-long workout. Advantages? The biggest is it takes me from 5 days on to 3 or 4 days on. It also buffers me with at least a day of recovery time which I sorely need. So far, so good. I’m still hovering around 180 pounds weight and can even work in a few adult beverages and/or junk food cheats each week.

Taekwondo: I have re-learned forms 1-8 and as of today also re-learned Koryo, the black belt form. Koryo is as rough as a corn cob but it’s back. Add to this the one-steps and self-defense steps that I treat as mini katas, the mook jong, and the miscellaneous crap that I’ve picked up these last 10 years and it makes for martial chaos. Right now I’m trying to hit the forms a couple times each week and also stretch. We’ll keep at it and see where it leads.

Rainbow trout: So the trout in these here parts are gearing up for the spring spawn. Ol’ Bob ditched the leg waders for some chest waders. The problem is I went for the “economical” waders. This means that they are not insulated. Problem? Umm…

So I geared up Saturday morning with the plan of hitting my trifecta of hot trout wading spots. All three spots are 45 minutes from me and within a 5 mile square of each other. The problems: 1) The wind came up at 7 a.m. Usually it does not pick up until around 11 a.m. but NOT this Saturday! 2) The air temp. was 35 degrees at night. It was forecast to get up into the 60’s but that would have been by mid-day. 3) The water temperature was between 35 and 40 degrees.

So 10 minutes into the river and I’m starting to feel the cold. I did not wear thermal underwear or socks so it did not take too long before I was freezing. Add to that my wet hands from casting and the wind and let’s just say it was a bitch. My fingers were swollen up and burning from the cold. It got so bad that I could not open a snap swivel with my bloated fingers and I was starting to have trouble using my rod.

Fish count: First spot I caught one and lost one due to my degrading physical condition. After warming up at the general store I went to spot #2. This time I skipped the waders and threw spoons from the shore. I was rewarded with one fatty Rainbow Trout — estimate about 3lbs. After that I literally said “Fuck this!”, cut my loses, and took my sorry ass home.

Next weekend I have a conference so I won’t get out. I’m planing to head back out in two weeks. There is a blue ribbon stretch of river that’s another 1.5 hours from my trifecta spot. It is literally world-renowned and I’ve been meaning to fish it going on four years. Part of the reason it’s so good is that it’s in the middle of bloody nowhere. Big rainbows and browns are common. One of my old pals is coming up in October to fish it. Consequently I need to figure out where it is and how to fish it before he gets here.

I’m definitely wearing thermal underwear, thermal socks, and bringing a few chemical hand warmers. I may also get my head examined.


  1. A pretty impressive video of a guy breaking a baseball bat with a round kick. Doubly impressive because nobody was holding steady. Rather, he hit a moving target and still broke it!
  2. Police in Seattle are looking for a “Hipster Ninja Masturbator“. Three-to-one odds says it’s either Fist in the Frost or Dojo Rat. 😉
  3. Nebraska had to halt production of it’s new license plate because it looks like a man fondling his sack. True story! SNL Weekend Update even made fun of this last night.

About Bob Patterson

I'm a naughty Vampire God!
This entry was posted in Fishing, Martial Arts, Musings, Operation Fatty, Opinion, P90X3, Rainbow Trout, Taekwondo, Training and tagged , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

7 Responses to Fishing and what not

  1. Rincewind says:

    Haha, oh u poor fisherman. I do love fishing but am quite enjoy sitting inside in the warm reading your story. 😉


  2. Tater says:

    3 hours! I’m not sure I’m driven by any desire that strong anymore to drive 3 hours to be uncomfortable for several more hours. Dang Bob.

    However, I do love the Seattle story. Although I’m not the ninja in question here I’m intrigued with what’s got this guy’s interest. Four times to the same house. He can’t keep away!.


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